News & Views

Doris Ex Machina, Part the Second

Where did I leave off? You will excuse me, but my memory is not so good any more now that I am dead.

Anyway, if I am remembering, my cousin Iulia gathered us all in the kitchen to tell us of what she would daydream. We were very much surprised when she told us of her hope to become a member of the Romanian Olympic Team.  That we would all become members of the Team. Iulia explained that we must all agree on a sport. Tunde suggested gymnastics. Doris said, what were the chances that Romanian girls would ever become world-class gymnasts? Doris is the smartest so we agreed that gymnastics was a bad idea.  We waited for Doris to suggest another sport. After much time, she suggested skeet shooting. Andreea had not so very long ago joined PETA. She explained to us how skeet are like humans, with hopes and dreams, with feelings and thoughts and a central nervous system and we were all deeply shamed by our willingness to murder poor defenseless skeet.

It seems that our Olympic dream would die there, until Vlad suggested that we form a synchronized swimming team. Vlad said he would be the team leader as he was of all the cousins the best at swimming.  If Vlad could tell you the story, which of course he cannot, he would tell you he was the best at everything. So you will not be surprised when I tell you that when we decided to perform a Greek classic on Romania’s Got Talent, that Vlad would play the part of God and that the rest of us would be the Greek chorus. Also that our acting troupe would be known as Vlad and the Impalerettes. But you are not ready to hear that part of my story. So please to forget about the Impalerettes. (I know, it is a hard thing to forget, but promise me you will try).

Because I am still needing to tell you about the Olympics. We were fortunate to secure the two best coaches in all of Romania, Paul and Irina Cojocaru.

Here they are at their home on the Black Sea. That’s Irina on the left.

We were fortunate indeed.


Adelina is the pretty one. She was born in Bucharest in 1887.

She died of tuberculosis in Brooklyn in 1936.

Being dead she has time to blog.

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